Azania Mosaka is that big sister who’s not aware you have adopted her but honestly, how can you not! She’s stolen our hearts from way back in the day on SABC and then later owning sisterhood and bringing women together in solidarity as the host of Total Bliss on Metro FM.
One thing that always stands out for me about Azania in interaction with the ever smiling Queen is her presence and sense of intention in all she does. It stays with you! If you have ever chatted to or interacted with Azania you will be sure to know this to be true – her presence in the moment and ability to pause and give you the time of day no matter who you are.
Now imagine her as a mom…
- As a mom of two, what has the motherhood journey been like for you personally?
The motherhood journey has been a revelation and one of the biggest sources of growth for me. I believe that our progeny are meant to heal us and challenge us because it is only through loving someone so wholeheartedly and through discomfort that we grow. I’ve healed and challenged my parents to make them better and my children have stretched and pushed me thereby bringing about my biggest growth. So motherhood has been profound and rewarding.
2. What has the most challenging stage during the development and growth of your children been?
I think every stage has its challenges. It depends on whether we shift our attitudes, prepare and open ourselves up enough to deal with that phase. I think the early teens (13,14, 15, 16) are challenging in parenthood. This is when a child begins to exercise their personal sovereignty and push the boundaries of self-expression. The moods, disagreements, hours behind closed doors, how consumed by their phones they are, the changing dress sense are all hallmarks of that period.
3. You’ve never been one to deal with private issues publically, but you recently defended your daughter during a cyber bullying incident. What is your take on giving our children freedom, affirming and demonstrating to them that we are on their side and trusting them to use that trust and affirmation we’ve given them responsibly?
As an admirer of Khalil Gibran’s The Prophet, I learned early on after my first child that children are Life’s desire to continue itself. He likens a parent to the bow and the child to the arrow and the being holding the bow and arrow is life. So as parents we are custodians and guides for life’s continuation.
That has been my approach. Do provide love, nurturing, guidance, provide boundaries but with the knowledge that my kids are here as their own people. To discover just as I am who they are and what their purpose is.
In the same breath, when the cyber bullying happened which was based on lies, I wasn’t about to leave my daughter to fend for herself alone in a Twitter cesspool of bullying and spectacle. I jumped in with her. We live in a society that hates women and expression of that hatred is all around us. I knew the truth and so I didn’t hesitate.
4. How has your upbringing influenced your choices in motherhood?
I was raised by a single mother who was a nurse for many years. She upskilled by going back to school and becoming a lecturer. My mom is a huge role model for me. She worked hard, she is selfless, went after her dreams and taught us well with love and discipline. She is a deeply spiritual praying woman and I have drawn many lessons on womanhood and motherhood. As overwhelming as parenting can be, my upbringing said it was possible and doable. Even when we didn’t have, she handled it with grace and dignity and that was a huge lesson for me. To maintain grace and dignity not matter the challenge.
5. What are your tips for working moms who are struggling with the juggling of it all?
Try not to feel guilty. For every long day you work, there should be a quality conversation and experience with your kids. Remember you are not here to merely be a mom. You are also here to dream, live your dreams, achieve your goals, fail and triumph. Yes this is a great responsibility that parents have been bestowed with but You are more than motherhood.
I wasn’t about to leave my daughter to fend for herself alone in a Twitter cesspool of bullying and spectacle. I jumped in with her. We live in a society that hates women and expression of that hatred is all around us. I knew the truth and so I didn’t hesitate.