My Dearest Finances,
What it do tho? Where are the multiple properties, companies and stellar investment portfolios at tho? Why am I still waiting on you to create wealth for me? Oh, wait, I actually have to be intentional about building a relationship and understanding with you? Eish! So you can’t just miraculously transform yourself into wealth for me? I actually need to put in the time and get to know you in order to improve my financial standing? Obviously or at least I hope it’s obvious, I’m being hella dramatic and sarcastic…well at least I hope it was obvious, lol.
As you know, this year at AoS we are all about intentionally growing where you are planted. And let me tell you something, I’m down for all the internal growth work as long as money is not involved. Now that I’m articulating it for you I can’t help but shake my head at the sheer ridiculousness of it all. I have voluntarily neglected my relationship with my money because for some reason the thought of talking about it makes me feel so uneasy. It’s rather sad and embarrassing.
So here I am bearing my financial heart to you. Be gentle with me and yourselves as we begin intentionally pouring into our financial relationship. It’s going to feel awkward but like all new relationships, the awkwardness decreases with each passing day. As a Black women, we encounter so much red tape and other frustrating forces. We cannot afford to not get serious about our relationship with money.
So here’s how I plan to overcome my financial relationship challenges. Therapy and by therapy, I mean enlisting the services of a Financial Advisor. Yeah, I’m saying I’m going to pay someone to be all up in my business, and no I can’t skimp on the cost by enlisting the help of a nosey friend who like me knows nothing about wealth building.
Part of growing is unlearning. We (the Black Community) have got to stop covering our conversations about wealth and money with embarrassment or shame. Many people struggle to amass wealth because the few of us that do have wealth struggle with a scarcity mentality, not realising that actually, the more we talk and share things about how we make our money the more we all can eat together and contribute to increasing each other’s wealth. In her editor’s note, Olwethu talked about how love is a commitment. (If you missed it you can find it here.
I lovingly commit, on this here Thursday 3rd of February 2022 to do right by my finances. Through the good and the bad – I’m ten toes down. I promise to honour our monthly self-care dates. I’m looking forward to getting to know you and learning from you. I’m looking forward to stewarding you well, and always in consultation with my financial community. Your financial community can consist of your financial advisor and two or three friends or family members you trust. You know the girlfriends who hold space for you to process some intimate details about your relationship with your significant other? The ones who don’t judge you but will call you out and hold you accountable when and if the need arises? Them the one’s sis, them the ones. And for those in relationships – depending on the financial arrangements between you and your partner, include them in your circle and plan joint dates with your partner. Set a monthly reminder and commit to it. No excuses!
You can cook your favourite comfort dinner, pour some wine, and pull out your credit/debit card statements. You want to go through and account for each charge. Look out for double charges, it happens more often than you might think. Ask yourself how each expense makes you feel, ie; are you happy with the shoes, does that dinner charge make you smile from the inside out? If the answer to your question is positive you’ve invested well.
Celebrate your wins! It’s so important as it’ll motivate you to continue winning and growing and reinforce your commitment. Set goals to save for big purchases or trips abroad. Most of all stay the course!
I am both thrilled and terrified to start this journey. So here’s to growing where you are financially planted.
We would love to hear if and how you are feeling moved to grow in this area of your life. Remember we need to unlearn some stuff in order to grow. Here’s to our year of financial growth, to whatever degree, actually, who am I kidding – to the highest degree!
Just what I needed to hear. We fear or finances and maybe if we fall in love with them things are abound to change